There’s a lot of noise right now about what it means to be a woman.
Everywhere you look: social media, TV, conversations, you’ll find different definitions. Be strong, but not too strong. Be soft, but not weak. Be independent, but also everything to everyone. It can feel confusing… even exhausting.
And if you’re trying to follow Jesus in the middle of all that, you might find yourself quietly asking:
“Am I doing this right?”
I’ve asked that too. I grew up in three different countries, totally different cultures. Each one of them with different definitions.
There have been moments where I’ve compared myself to other women, some who seem to have it all together, others who seem so confident in completely different values. And somewhere in between, I’ve felt the tension of wanting to honor God… while also trying to understand my place in today’s world.
But here’s what I’ve been gently reminded of:
God is not confused about who you are.
A Different Kind of Definition
The world constantly redefines womanhood, but God reveals it.
Not as a rigid checklist, not as pressure to perform, but as an identity rooted in Him.
When we look at Scripture, we don’t see one personality type or one lifestyle. We see women who were:
- Brave and bold
- Gentle and nurturing
- Leaders, mothers, businesswomen, servants
But what they all had in common wasn’t a personality… it was a heart aligned with God.
A Woman Who Lived It: Esther
Think about Esther.
She lived in a culture that was far from godly. She was placed in a position she didn’t choose, surrounded by pressure, expectations, and risk. Yet, when the moment came, she didn’t let culture define her courage, God did.
She fasted. She prayed. And then she stepped forward, even when it was scary.
“And who knows but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this?” (Esther 4:14)
Esther didn’t become godly by escaping her culture, she became godly by standing firm in God within it.
And that’s the same calling we have today.
What It Really Looks Like
Being a godly woman today isn’t about fitting into a mold.
It looks like:
- Choosing humility when pride would be easier
- Trusting God when everything feels uncertain
- Speaking truth with love, not fear
- Living with quiet strength, even when no one notices
Sometimes it’s bold.
Sometimes it’s hidden.
Sometimes it’s simply choosing to keep going.
And none of it is wasted.
When You Feel the Tension
You might feel pulled in different directions:
- Between faith and culture
- Between calling and responsibility
- Between who you are and who you think you “should” be
That tension doesn’t mean you’re failing.
It might actually mean you’re paying attention.
And in those moments, you don’t need to have all the answers, you just need to stay close to the One who does.
What has really helped me? Go back to the word of God!
The more time we spend in God’s Word, the more clarity we gain about who we are and how we’re called to live. So much of the confusion we feel fades when we sit with Scripture and allow it to shape our perspective instead of the world around us.
Lately, I’ve really been enjoying Women of the Word by Jen Wilkin. It’s been such a helpful reminder of how to truly study the Bible, not just for quick encouragement, but to deeply understand who God is. And that changes everything.
There’s a powerful truth often shared in Christian teaching: the more we know God, the more we understand ourselves. As we grow in the knowledge of His character, His holiness, His love, His faithfulness… we begin to see our identity more clearly through His eyes, not the world’s.
And honestly, that kind of clarity is what anchors us in a culture that’s constantly shifting.
Who are we in God?
As a mom of a teenage daughter, this topic is not just something I write about, it’s something we live out in real conversations. We often talk about the difference between the world’s expectations and God’s truth, and how easy it is to get those two confused.
There’s so much pressure on girls today to look a certain way, act a certain way, or measure up to constantly changing standards. And in the middle of those conversations, I always try to bring her back to what matters most.
I like to end our talks with a simple but meaningful reminder:
“Girl… put your crown on.”
Not a crown the world gives, but one that comes from knowing who you are in God.
Because Scripture reminds us:
“But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession…” (1 Peter 2:9)
And also:
“See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God!” (1 John 3:1)
We are not defined by trends, opinions, or comparison.
We are daughters of the King.
And when our girls truly understand that, they begin to walk differently; with confidence, with purpose, and with a quiet strength that doesn’t need the world’s approval.
So I’ll keep reminding her… and maybe you need this reminder today too:
Put your crown on. You belong to Him.
Pause to Reflect
Take a quiet moment and ask yourself:
- Where am I feeling pressure to define myself outside of God’s truth?
- Am I seeking approval more from people or from God?
- What does it look like for me, personally, to walk with God in this season?
- Where might God be inviting me to trust Him more deeply?
Write your answers down if you can. Be honest. There’s no judgment here.
A Simple Prayer
Lord,
Thank You that You created me with purpose and intention.
In a world full of mixed messages, help me to hear Your voice clearly.
Remind me of who I am in You when I start to forget.
Give me strength to stand firm, wisdom to walk gently,
and peace to trust that I am exactly where You want me to be.
Shape my heart to reflect Yours.
Amen.
A Final Encouragement
You don’t have to chase every definition of womanhood you see around you.
You don’t have to prove your worth.
You don’t have to get it all right.
Being a godly woman isn’t about perfection, it’s about direction.
It’s about turning your heart toward God, again and again, even in the middle of a loud and confusing world.
And the beautiful truth is this:
He is faithful to guide you every step of the way.
If this encouraged your heart, share it with a friend who may need gentle reassurance today.
With Love,
Priscila
“There’s a powerful truth… the more we know God, the more we understand ourselves. As we grow in the knowledge of His character, His holiness, His love, His faithfulness… we begin to see our identity more clearly through His eyes, not the world’s.”
This!!!!
Time in his presence = being more like him!
Yes!